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You Better Call Charlie: Classic Case of Bird Law

Parrot Rats out Owner in Murder Case

Marty Duram, 45, was found shot to death in his Michigan home in 2015.” “Duram had been shot five times. His wife had been shot in the head. She claimed to remember nothing about the shootings.” -Inside Edition

Just your standard, everyday attempted double homicide. Luckily the wife survived. Nothing too crazy right? WRONG! I hear to forth declare bird law on this fork night!

HOLY SHIT! Someone call Charlie Kelly Bird Attorney! The shit this bird was repeating is legit terrifying. Repeating the last words a dead person…are you kidding me…thats brilliant!

Seeing Charlie on any side of this bird law dispute would be hilarious. Or maybe he would actually represent the bird. That actually makes more sense. “I have advised my parrot client here to keep his mouth shut until you make him an offer he cannot refuse, your excellency judge.” “My client has turrets syndrome you cannot hold him incompetent.” “MOVE TO STRIKE!”

The fact that this parrot will repeat curse words is awesome. I would constantly just yell “YOU GODDAMN BIRD BITCH” and I would rename it Deandra, obviously. Also what if you’re banging HOORRRSSS? Does the bird repeat sex talk as well? I have a ton of unanswered questions, not about the case because I don’t give a shit, but about this birds abilities. Gotta have answers.



 

 

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